Bu - bye!

Goodbye to you my dearest friends....as much as I wish we didn't have to part for this short while, I can't help it.

Friday was one challenging day in my life. I had to stay strong though. I don't know if it was about being bored without friends around or just some bond we created over the few months we met. I try not to be so emotional but truth is, I cherish friendship more than anything you could imagine.

Hmmm..Itz holidays and most of my buddies are hitting home. For the rest of us that are lurking behind, itz gonna be a long one. I did not have the opportunity to say goodbye to all my dear friends b ut I was opportuned to bid some very dear ones farewell. Itz not like we'd be gone for too long. Itz just a couple of months but I will sure miss you guys.

We promised to stay in touch but as true as that is, we might not meet each other ever again but, don't give up on hope. The world is such a small round globe. I do appreciate the times we shared, the dabs and hugs, the sms'es and attention. Most of all the feeling of being your bud. DO me a favor guys, stay outta harmz way until we meet again.

MERRY CHRISTMAS & A RIB_BREAKING NU YEAR .....in Advance!

pEACE,

Ub

Zouk!

The exams are just over. Thinking of what to do to keep the day going, I decide to lurk around in college. Therez this Street Jazz festival bullshit in school so everyone is busy doing shit in preparation.

Had to help out doing some shit and was wary of where the evening would lead. Had dinner on Fahd and headed to Atria to pick up some stuffs. Headed back we were armed with a bottle of Rosemary Churchill and some mango juice.......as I said, anything can happen.

Walked back to my place and had a quick shower while Fahd waited. Next destination was Fahd's crib. Met Ariff and Eleena. A few shots and stuff we're enroute KL. Itz ladies night and we're hitting. Two sweet damsels to go with we couldn't be more blessed. I could feel jealous eyes peering at us...the girl was HOT!

Buzz whirled, sweat flowed, whiskey(on the rocks) fumed, I think we was having fun. Hipped around till the wee hours but, had to out! Eleena was working later. Somehow, this was my wish-To dance with this shorty at some night club and reality was thursday!

Back home, Fahd tried to get me tipsy but even though that was the first time in entire life put together - I had to gulp down the much amount of Rosemary Churchill, i still stayed strong... yeah! stronger than I had imagined. I was ready for anything but was so surprised I was still standing.

.....and the 'day' ended.....tsk....somethings should go on forever.

Acerbate

I thought I was over this but I saw it creep in little tiny bits and pieces this morning. Over the years, I have learnt to have absolute control over my emotions and vexation. It really had a toll on me but life and Dad thought me that I'll have to confront my 'bad' or face the dreaded consequence.

Yeah from my many years of therapy, it really takes a 'bomb!' to make me a piqued. I mean, I can control almost any situation even if I am boiling inside if only I could save friendships and have other people happy. I remember when I was growing out of teenage. My father saw that spanking did not solve the problem of my unruly behaviour, he resorted to the perfect remedy.....spanking with words. God! I hated to be sat down for hours and be supposedly counselled. And my Dad just found the perfect therapy for me. Whenever he knew I did something wrong, He'd sit me down and talk about it for ages....lord-knows he was good at it. Goodbye to the days of occasional spanking. When he noticed my displeasure and annoyance while counselling he'd increase the hours of counselling and even wake me up at odd hours only to talk,....tsk. There were times I felt like leaving him with words hanging in his mouth but I decided otherwise.

This whole thing taught me what I should have learnt easily the hard-way. It came to a point that I could take insults from whoever outside but can't stand the thought of Dad 'counselling'....that bad! I dunno where I am headed with this but, I had since learned my lesson that an angry man is the devil's-workshop.

I could pass for an anger management test but, the slightest-unimaginable-insignificant thing could make me blow my lids off. Damn!...you could have the lids flying off in miles. I guard my pride very judiciously and if you want to see un-bridled rage...fcuk with it.

I couldn't believe how angry(displeased could fit-in better) I was when my friends made me wait for more than two hours for them to get prepared. I did not know what I was angry at. Perhaps it had to do with my Pride. We had an understanding that we were leaving by 12noon. I got up by 10:30 to prepare so I won't keep them waiting(sometimes it takes quite some time for me to get down and out). It occured that even at 1:30pm I still found myself waiting for them. People should just learn to keep appointments( especially if it has to do with the future). You should feel my rage now. I did not act my anger but remained as calm as I could be but it was still obvious. Somehow, I was angry not at them but at myself for waiting that long and alowing me to be angered.

It's all over, I learnt to be stupid for any body or thing, if only it will make them feel or appear 'wise'. That's the much I respect and revere my buddies. Don't ride on my intelligence though, you might just experience a different scenario.

Anger ain't reflex, it could be quelled.

Merry-go round

Isn't life like Ub, Moe and Mohd in a small Kecil automobile?

With Mohd on the wheels not really sure of what he is doing;

trying to make-up as our driver seeing we had no alternatives

not knowing the routes well and kindda hesistant to ask around?

Isn't life like Mohd moving a car with the 3rd and 4th gear

not with very much success though...

despite the number of times I asked him to do otherwise and,

the engine being dead in the middle of flowing traffic?

Isn't life like three responsible guys driving in a not-so-familiar route

with no route-map and no directions from passers-by

blarring away the music box not minding that we are not headed anywhere

turning round and begining all over like we are in a maze?

Some people eventually find their way home on time

others take a while to get to destination

turning round like blind foxes is what others find fun!

Yet, isn't this what life's all about?

Whatz fun?

Promises are meant to be broken....not.
I made a promise to update ma blog as often as is not possible and I am trying not to break that....see! I got ma integrity to protect. I really have a thousand and one reasons not to blog, but, I'll save it.
Itz been pretty tough and by that I mean.....TOUGH. I thank God for strength otherwise I would have broken down by now. I would rather not talk about this yet until I am through with it.......but God is still faithfull.
Exams coming up, and a couple of other occasions has given me a cause to panic.....not really panic, but, a bit tremidated. (isn't it the same thing?)

The weekend was great at some instances. Friday evening saw us buzzying around, trying to give Gezahla some 'ass-wrecking' surprise. It was her BDAY! Drove off to 1 utama to get some stuffz. Mohd on the wheels added to the excitement. He is a 'wonderful' driver! I couldn't recall the number of times ma heart jumped into ma mouth as he 'danced' with the car in the midst of impatient motorists. Made turns for what seemed like 'eternity-remixed' and finally, we found our way back to Puncak. That was not it. The night was still young to to Gombak we were headed. We had to see some 'homies' strickly on business terms and god-knows we took like 4-5 hours driving round and round the highways trying to find our bearing. Stopped to refuel at about three gas stations. Turned out to be more fun than it appeared. We were not home until 3am.

We had a nice time out together with our circle of friends...'niggas and niggas-wannabees'. Eyes couldn't keep from turning in our direction wondering what these breed of humans were up to. It was great to see such a mix of breeds and culture get along well, understand themselves despite the language differences and laugh so loud you'd freak. Gezahla has a great family though!

Stayed home the whole of saturday doing stuff. Went out on Sunday and did silly things such as playing football at 12:30am and going off for supper at about 3:00am. The long and short of it is that......I think we had fun!

Clones

Letz start this somewhere. I got a problem. When I got stuffz to write on, I am nowhere the computer, When the flows down, I am clicking away the mouse(perhaps mice) as one just-castrated wierdo, but, Itz all good! I don't need no pat in the back to do this, I just need a good set at home with some global link and I am stunting! That in simple term means, .......Laziness. Tag.

After blabbering around, I haven't still got in touch with ma brains to put into 'bits' what I been thinking about lately. You know what?......This blog thingy is all about ma thoughts(aloud). I feel so exposed everytime I blog here. Seems like I always 'see evil and tell evil'. Seems like this isn't working either so, how about I gossip! Yeah! You know thatz what girls do for fun. When a girl tells you - 'boring-lah!'; it means in the literal sense that you are not being a good gossip mate.

That was by the way. It stuck me today while in Siva's Telekom class. Some people will never get to speak Semi-proper English even though they are going to have to study in English for more than 1095days! Now, the problem might be more of lack of concern on the part of the student than it is of lack of competent of our dear lecturers. We would have to officially learn English Language for a couple of years, after that, we are only going to need to communicate with it. Going by the official study slots might not be sufficient time.

I don't do history but, according to one of the great gurus of the good-old-days; "all languages are spoken with an attitude. Speak English with such!" It is okay not to speak English with 'the' accent but the case of not minding what comes outta our mouth is insulting. Not only to the owners of 'the language' but to those who want to understand what the hell you are talking about too! Every country has their own versions of English and the are rapidly getting patented by the year. The point is just to create something that sounds "ours!" and is supposedly easier to comprehend.

It might be sound cool in the local scence but, English being a global 'linqua franca', Patented English would not sound as cool as is annoying and stupid. The much time that is put-into learning this 'pigdin' English could be well enough to learn how to communicate in English that is more globally accepted. This is whether or not you are exposed to good learning facilities. The further we want to alienate English Language, the more it becomes pertinent that we know at least the basics if not more! This makes for better understanding and tolerance. How could you tolerate someone you can't understand? That was a whole turn missed. I must have gone rounds and round.

It has come down to the fact that in our schools, knowledge cannot be dissipated the way it should.How could it be? the knowledge 'banks' are not able to share their knowledge in a language that is understood by their subjects....pardon me! - Students. I took out time to take a mind survey and found out that people won't just get it! How could they? The little time the could use it for practice, they ain't using it properly. The other times they are 'patriotically' chatting away their local languages that might not need more practice to perfect. This is 'cool' though, maybe a l'll bit frustrating when you are outta the hood.

Maybe not as annoying as having the lecturer you are paying to sell-off some knowledge, explain stuffz to you in some strange langauge when English is supposed to be the tool. You feel like throwing punches when you hear this packets of 'fake' English combine into noise in a Telekom class....tsk! As much as we would love to push the blame on some other person, learning is a very personal thing. If you do not put in much effort in acquiring knowledge, you might just remain there!....you know where! Remember, the Cow can be taken to the pub but it can't be forced to drink. Poof!..... You wanna speak better semi-English, you'll either have to be born with it or, get down with a bit of learning.

....and itz not just speaking English, itz about doing so with an attitude....'an' accent. Except your folks 'really' care, you might not learn it your whole life. You've gotta stand up and take a challenge. I remember buying some good "english' movies and adopting one of the characters there. Thriving to speak and 'carry' myself as them. It paid off!

This blog could make a best-selling book *hahahaha!*, but, I am having this feeling that you might be as bored to read this shit as I am bored to write. So, "wan take a break lah?"

"We continue from here arh! can or not?". 'Can!....so see you next time wan'

Selamat Datang!

Ok! That would be the word of the month....and finally the first phase of the holiday is over, Itz time to put ass down and think with the head not with the 'you know what!' Fcuking and been fcuked are totally two different things. You grab?

Mr Fu welcomed us back from holidayz with a kick-ass Maths test. I was down with migraine and fever that I wasn't really prepared for Mr Fu's Fucking Maths. Somehow, I managed to attempt excepting the mistakes, I ride! A couple of mid-term tests, dem ladies, one night fever-cum-migraine headache, bling getting towards the low end....tsk. A lot has happened lately.

Really thought of really studying during the 'god-sent' holidays, you know what i'm saying, get serious with life for the umpteenth time(whatever that means) but, ....The play station had some alternative plans. I did not get up except to exercise ma numb pentadactyls or grab a bite of 'junk'.....but, itz all good! At least me was able to stay home and not get ma ass messed up in some shit outta there.

Damn! It was longer than I thought. I couldn't help but hope that college frees me of ma 'imposed-solitude'.

Lurked around in the house doing stuff, shopped for some grocs so I made all ma meals and had it home, watched some good-cum-silly movies and before I knew it, I was late for ma morning class when the hols lifted. DONT ask questions. Occassions have occured that has maimed ma pride but itz all good! Someone would draw strength someday just readin ma story .....says ma bruh. While you trying to decode that, I'll grab a bite.....

......paces out

Holi....Shit!

Some people like it some hate 'em. I just read in the papers today that an official date has been fixed for some Sultan's B-day which is supposedly goin' to be a public holiday. This issue of too numerous holidays is even more sickening than fever. Especially for people from outta town like me. Not only is it boring as Hell in the afternoon, you always end up doing shit and exceeding bugdets.

People are excited 'bout this thing here but Bruh doesn't need 'nay silly hols. Just need to finish this 'shit' within the shortest possible time and out! I can't count the number of public holidays that we have been subjected to here. Itz crazy! Every 'tom', 'dick' and 'harry' has their own share of the booty. Itz fun! But me thinkz there should be an holiday for niggas here too. why should we be slighted?

Again, there is this long one spanning from tommorrow till god-knows-when. The number of days we've had holidays for this semester might out-number the days we don't. This should be a great news for playas but it happens that the field's close too. When the play-ground is closed, what do playas do?

I'll miss ya'll ma buds...you guys just play cool and safe aight? You can only talk about this things...nothing more!

Yeah! I have this book I have been faithfully looking for in our 'well-stock-up-to-date-state of the art Library for the past two months..."Students hide it, and shit" was the response I got from the L'berians. So, It up today and I cannot borrow because I have exceeded the quota of books your-truly can borrow at a go so, I can't get it tommorrow or next because it is some fcuken Hols.....Plus, I have some books that will be due during the 'shitty' Hols. Yoh'll see the plight bruhz into....tsk...is the only word what I can utter.

You know, I was wandering about what will happen in the near future when everyone that farts gets a holiday and the number of days in the year-of-our-Lord without a 'holi' is exceeded. Until then, may God have mercy on poor playas.....Ase.

I am in!

My high entropy lifestlye is beginning to wear-down. I am finding ma foot again but it might not last long as it appears. I have learnt a lesson to enjoy and have fun while it lasts. Dunno wanna cry no more over spilt milk.

Most of the Mid-term exams are almost over and man has to study hard for the finals as the mid-term thingy was nothing to write home about. I could only take solace in sleep and hope that, a star falls from the sky into ma bossom.

LOtz have occured during the past couple of days but they ain't worthy of mention so I won't bother. You know the feeling of being lurved and hated? ...The occasional 'dabs' and 'hugs'. Shit happens! Ain't gonna do nothing 'bout that.

It was very lazying and dissapointing to hop-in a cab in the morning and rush expectantly for ma morning class only to find out it is cancelled. This guys are sick! Now, thatz not the point. That I have to wait from 9am till 3pm for another two-hour-boring class is sickening. ..But I made it through! Thatz the story.

Inbetween boredom, I managed to keep busy - study, bug people, talk, and flirt. Therez this home-boy from the far west of ma hood that just came into town and college so, I thought he might use some company( the nigga was sitting so dejectedly. JJC?.....Nah!). It just dawned that I am no more the only dude from ma hood here....wow! I got pair..not!

For the first time in a long while I was really in-phase with ma PCBD (Printed Circuit Board Design) Lecturer. I was able to stay-with-him until the end of the un-usually short class. I think is was perhaps due to the rather small size of the class and the fact that I might be burdened to explain the whole lesson to Mohamad who was absent for whatever reasons. You think I could deliver? ...tsk.

Wandering up and down college, I came across this 'one-of-the-many-useless-pieces of paper' posted littery about college. Boredom said read! ..and Behold, I am selected to be in ma collegez football team. This should not be a big deal but it tells me that some people are getting over prejudice. I only have to prove ma mettle to be in field and avoid just warming the bench.

That the much I can do for now. I'll be back!

Mine

You are ma sherperd

I sha'nt want nothing

yoh make lay-back in green meadows

refreshing ma soul

Yoh lead me besides peaceful springs

just for your namez sake

Yeah! though I walk thro' the valley shadows of death'

I will fear no evil

for thou art with me

Thy rod and thy staff they comfort me

Yoh'll prepare a banquet for me

in the prescence of ma rivals

...anointing ma head with oil

until ma cup ov'r flows

I am sure that goodness and mercy shall follow me

all the days of ma life

and I shall only lay in your bossom

till time times no more

Crap!

I have been kindda busy doing nothing for the past couple of days so, therez been virtually no time to blog. Perhaps, I'll do this list thingy too.

Things that I have done recently:

• flouted my PCBD mid-term. Any thing more than a 'D' will be a miracle.
• got sore-throat and cold after drinking Janis' Ribena. I am so sick!....not.
• Semi-conductor's mid-term wasn't too bad but I was so so that I couldn't concentrate. I hope the lecturer gets so so so he doesn't concentrate while marking but give me underserved marks....hah!
• think someone's stalking me.....for whatever reasons.
• feeling so disorganised since I moved out of ma place.
• slept so bad that I didn't study much for ma telekom mid-term. I feel I did so badly.....not.
• hugged someone so fiercely for not calling in a long while.
• gettng outta here cos it seems I really lost contacts with ma brain and got nothing 'portant to blog.

Puasa

It felt like home waking up with ma homies around. They are a bunch of characters and we just couldn't laugh enough. This might just last for a while but we'll enjoy every moment as it comes.

I just felt like it today so I joined my friends to 'puasa'. When I was having my-time in the morning, I just had this urge to stay off calories. I wasn't really sure I could make it cos, the only meal I had the whole of yesterday was two pieces of chicken and some fries. I slept with that and I was already hungry by 9am!

Somehow, I made it through!..and I havn't had anything except for some juice Janis bought for me till now. And my stomachz screaming......HUNGER!!! That brings me back to her. Guys tell me stories but shez really fun to hang around with. Talked about shit and stuff and went up to play with small balls.....by that I mean ping-pong. I can tell she had fun watching but,....too bad, Dadz come a-calling and BITCH has to home. Yeah, she said my name is U Bitch...thatz exactly what it means,......now, say ma name....*U Bitch*..aight you just said that. Keep the name aight! and I am outta here.

Packing....

Letz see....I shouldn't really be doing this. I have got three consecutive exams from tommorrow through friday and beyond. As it appears, I am so ready for it....not.

I will just give a crunch of events that has happened in the past couple o' days.

• Friday

It was a boring day except that I wound it off eating my bowels out at some BBQ thingy. I was so full and had a nice time meeting up with new 'kpods'.

• Saurday

My lecturer made me sick and I my grades are not paying off so I took a free time from a postponed date to 'jack' in the Library. I stayed up till evening when the library was about closing up.....See, I want to study but the are closing up the damn cold-room. Asha called me up and said to bring me some umbrella she'd bought for me in singapore. Now thta is what I call sweetness. Not only the fact that the shade is gonna keep me dry made me excited,....it is designers!...Yeah!...some Fils thingy....but I really appreciate it. It was like someone buying me a house and driving it to my place.....tsk. The next event was Sleep. Thatz all I could recall.

• Sunday

Itz a holy day! I was all suited up waiting for this sonofabitch(thatz his name right!) to pick me up. He was a bit late but I made it there. I never reall enjoyed a sermon since I came to Malaysia..this one was not only enriching but fun. 'Lepaked' with some humans after church and came home to realise that I had to move out not later than the next day. Thatz not funny is it?....aight, the funny part is that I dunno know where to move into (or is it to?).

Made a few frantic calls that did nothing better than swoop my credit and gave-up when it wasn't paying off. I realised that the best I could do in this situation was to sleep. I didn't hesistate you'd bet.

• Monday

This is crazy! Itz the first day of the month. Not very much of a good start, but the fcuken holiday gave me time to sleep, make sos calls, sleep again, pack-up my stuffz, walk round the apartment, pick up coins, gym.....damn! I did lotz of activities in the space of how long..arh!

My last call to Asha was what I should have done since-ly. Mohd said I can put up in his place for a while so Asha came round with her Van and not only whisked ma stuff to Puncat Damansara, bought me a good dinner at McDonalds.

Set up ma new room, did stuffz and slept at about 3:00am.....but God has been so good to me. Tommorowz another great day!

Damn! I can't even remember these events but the threshold was that I moved out o' ma place to a temporary place

Blues

Ever had this days that was blue and every thing you did seemed not just right? It goes on till dusk and you just give up and write-off the day as being 'just' bad. That was the kind of day I had. It baffles me that some days as so good that it affects the next days. Kindda strips the next dya of all it's goodness I suppose.

Wenesday is always a day to behold. Full of suckers. I wasn't expecting much but it went worse than I envisiaged. It started with an unfinished lab. experiment and went on to me dozing-off in my PCB-design class for the first time ever since I joined college. My lecturer scolded me for dissapointing him and letting someother murderfcukers outsmart me!~

I left class without really getting what the hell he said. I was kindda remorseful that I opted not to go online but go back home and crash. I hit bed at 8:00pm and wasn't still satiated when I woke by 9:00am the following morning....I dunno whatz happening to me...I really have had a short attention span of late. perhaps I am sick..letz not dwell much on a bad day.....tommorrow will be a better day!

Whatz in a life?

This is fast becoming like a habit. I felt so not like posting for the next couple of days but it appears that I'd do a rethink. Events that are worth reminiscing about have occured during the few couple of days and it is only feasible that I put them in hard memories.

Walking back home from a friend's at about 11:47pm, I am statled with this long queue of vehicles and unusual noise. I was no- less surprised when I saw this completely battered Vehicle embossed in the Chinese Temple just outside college with the bricks that fell off with the impact scattered all over the highway. It seemed like an art-work. How it got in there and how the two humans that were in the car survived still baffles me.

What left me enthralled is our regard for human life. The nonchalant attitude of the so-called fire men who arrived lazily and took like forever to rescue the young man from the trapped vehicle kepy me appalled. Concerned passers-by who had unfinished stubs of cigarettes in their mouth tried to rescue the other occupant of the car and rushed her to the hospital but the poor guy couldn't be got out as the car was locked. The guy wriggled in pain for about 10mins.

The arrival of the 'Bomba' gave me a splint of hope for the guy but when the 'old' men alighted from the truck and walked as if human life was not at stake, I concluded the the guy is half as good as dead. I cursed in between prayers that this young man who apparently was over-speeding does not 'slip-off'.

The crowdedness of the area alone would have suffocated the young man to an otherwise-early death. Wonder what the law-enforcement officers there were doing. There was no 'caution' line drawn to keep people at a distance from the scence and you could see people who should have rather been helping busy taking illegal pictures of the accident scene. Isn't this sick?

After what seemed like 20mins, the dude was taken out into a strecher that took about a minute to unfold and some lazy men strolled away with him. Incidents like this occur just to keep my mind whirling and cursing...why can't people be more passionate about life? I wasn't sure whether to worry about the 'chinese deities' who might have been probably hurt during the bang, the stop-and-look passers-by who were apparently going to cause another accident, or the poor victim who was deciding whether to 'quit' or 'stay'. I'd say he must have been very lucky to have survived that bang!

I left the scene re-accessing my entire life and calculating how easy it is to 'cross-over' or be handicapped for life. I often Wonder how much I have thanked God for keeping me away from this straying casaulties. It could have been me!

261004

I would give today a sizeable mark if I were to score 'em. The fact that my first class was cancelled didn't mean a thing. I used the free time rather wisely, talking to friends I have not seen in a long while and doing stuff. A bunch of buds have been showing me love lately and this helps me to overcome the shrills of home-sickness....I miss mum!

Mr Fu's class was rather dull today...I had been looking forward to it but a few characters kept me so distracted. I managed to get in some wits before I blanked out. It seemed like the day was rather short of moved faster than usual cos' all the activities came to a halt after what seemed like a minute. Sat back with homies and yapped......then J came along.

J'z a gracious girl...not. She had the phrase 'graciousness is a virtue' on her limbs and thought to think about it. Walked her to 'pi'....(she keeps 'piiing' all da time) and talked about god-knows-what for some time as she made some free style writings on ma paper( she damn has a thing for arts...plus..she sings damn well)......then daddy called. She struted away and I had to out too. I kindda grabbed a lot about her during the rather short meet. Things like her Chinese name....'su - mei' and the fact that she actually hasn't quit smokes(smokingz bad for your health sweetheart....don't you grab?). I wouldn't want to dwell much on J but she could be a bit interesting to be with...sometimes.

So is graciousness really a virtue? We'll talk about this later. You guys think about it for a minute...I gat a mid-term Exams to study for...chao!

Timely

Somethings were just not meant to be

don't try to adorn it

for soon it starts rotting.

Somepeople are just not worth the love

don't waste the affection

invest it wisely.

When love grows cold

so bitter it bites your skin

there's warmth on a willing shoulder.

Gently let those pearly drops

drain away the dangling fears

for true love outlasts sheer lust

this you are sure to learn.

Love's not a feeling, it's human!

the minute it's slips you see it.

-Ub.

Welding!

"And a man shall leave his father and mother and shall cling to a woman and the two shall become one....for it is NOT good that man should be alone".

I haven't been to two occasions in a long while. They are weddings and funerals. I love this duo because the have something to do with the genesis of fauna. I was oportuned to attend the former on saturday and though it was not like what I am used to, I sat-back and reminisced. They call it wedding ceremonies, I call it welding ceremonies.....two people become one! How would that be except that they are welded. Now, you may call that a lame argument but I can sure run with it.

It is worth the thought that two people out of all the more fair substitutes choose themselves and vow to love each other 'till death do us part'. I sat there in the Church auditorum and asked myself, do this people really know or mean what they are saying? The though of death doing us part is not one that I would love to dwell on on a joyous day but as it appears, the Priest isn't aware of the fact that this young couple want to 'live happily ever after', have kids and probably, don't think of 'death doing them part' too soon. Please don't make me believe that any quarrels or misunderstandings would make them forget this vows made with occasional tears.

It is likened to a boy-girl relationship. Boy loves girl and girl is swooning. You can't just help but be a li'll bit jealous about them(it's healthy aight!). Soon girl finds out the boy snorts and boy realises she ain't vogue . Shit happens! I just borrowed this phrase from a friend. Yeah shit happens.....it may take a while or might just be what seems like a fraction of second. I really don't know where I am going with this but, This whole is as confusing as it appears. Some couples are so immature that they really don't know what they want from each other. They can't make their choice but leave this important obligation to chance and the s0-called opportunities.

We all go into relationships with expectations. This is the main cause of break-ups and stuff. It's all embeded in our selfish human nature. We want what good we can get outta it not what good we can un-attachingly offer. Thatzit! What you were expecting doesn't come forth and you conclude.....''that was not it!''. Letz try another game. If we clearly state our expectation when going into any relationship, we could minimise heart-breaks that accompany break-ups.

It's all a matter of choice. This is determining factor! Make the right choice and you jump...make the slightest error in choice and you grump. Sometimes it is good to go on escapades but when it comes to 'till death do us part' shouldn't we be more careful? I have been a very choosy person but of late I found out that my choice, personified, might just be another character in some fairy tale. I have since decided that neither will I let fate or circumstance make me choice. I choose with my heart.....now, that the best way to choose. Our choosiness might cause us a great deal. Choose with the head and you're bound to do a lot of calculations which might turn-out faulty. But they heart guards all things diligently.....try as much as you can to deceive yourself by thinking otherwise.

Nobody wants this counsels nowadays, we just go for the hot cakes not bothering if it burns. I have since learnt my lessons. Move when you can. Every risk is not worth taking. Every opporunity is just not IT!

It is quite hard for me to romance the phrase...'till death do us part'. ....'and they lived happily ever after' is more consoling. Untrue as it sounds

I really didn't mean to do this....for a while my fingers and brains seemed to communicate. I lost the link.....tsk.....we'll do this again...I need to find date. Gotta experience this thing too....................paces out!

Stupid

I set no itineraries on weekends. I know anything can happen. I just go with the turf. Yeah! It blew me to this welding ceremony this weekend and I came back head spinning with many unanswered questions. Trying relax and slip into oblivion, Friend rings me up and says to spend the weekend at Kl. I got ready and wa whisked away the minute I sheded my 'welding' apparels. It's nice to be away from boring Pj for a couple of hours.

Everything I did seemed not right or totally wrong. I saw myself regretting every silly action taken. I was really mad at me. I did things as stupid as making phone calls when I actually didn't have what to say or is it...... forgotten what to say? Tell me I am infatuated and you are not far from being true. I was at the verge of breaking down a much cherished relationship. Somehow, I managed to keep things in shape not after surfering the shame of being a complete stooge.

I didn't have much fun except that I played 'real' football and 'lepaked' until my stomach ached for holiday. That was not to be as my friend made sure I ate all that was served(..reminds me of mum). If you don't see me add sommore flesh, something's either wrong with your eyes or with ma hormones. Got to meet a few 'kpods' and rested after braiding another friends hair. Damn..I never thought I could braid Asian hair! It'z so goddamn slippery and wouldn't hold even when I resorted to using gel and tying it.....I ain't no pro aight?

A couple of hours more, I left this shorty beaming with smiles and ready to show whoever cared the following morning that she was black too. She looked lovely with braids on and reminded me of my baby "ALICIA KEYS....damn..I love that girl so goodly.

That was by the way. What ever else happened is not so important or I just wouldn't say but trust me! Nothing bad happened aight except that I had to be about my business a bit too often.....gotta have space for sommore shit. I am a good bad boy remember!~hahahaha*dumb one*

Whatz fun?

I have had it in torrents these days. Things have happened that is worthy of mention and I am doing just that!

My Thursday had a part II. I thought it was all over when folks started leaving college but I was so wrong. The day was just beginning!

My School decided to treat us to a sumptous dinner after a thorough week of sports. It was good to have something free from my school at least. The certificate I had - though they spelt my father's name as 'Mathhew' instead of 'Matthew'( This will bring me to Grammar in KDU!), was my second in th last few months. Think I should be happy with them? ..Nah...They denied me of my right to merit scholarship and it will take one to forgive them.

I ate as I was on food scholarship and left with enough energy to make it to the Promotions and Advertising Department on the 2nd floor.

Yep. My friends were taking some shots for KDU and I decided I should spend the rest of my boring day watching them have their photos taken. Mohamed was looking gorgeous! His girlfriend must have been very proud. We went on and on and we did not leave until the rain would subside enough for Vanessa to drop us off at Tariq's. If you need to know the aftermath, Tune into 9TV...........................peace.

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Friday is always a day to behold. I feel so lazy that it bothers even those around me. You can't help it guys, I got ma life to live..yoh'll know what I am saying?

My stupid class ended rather early. I felt at a point like slapping some dumb arsehole who will not shut up for Mr. Siva to continue lying to us about some Telecomm shit.

"H" had ma phone so I couldn't retrieve Zah's contact to shout out at her. Who cares! She could have the goddamn phone for all I care! Tried to study but got carried away by these shortyz.you know they won't let this nigga be!

CF was great! There was this charimatic and youth-oriented speaker but I missed part of her. I didn't miss lunch. NO! hahaha.....'yakit!' I am not fasting wan...

Sat with some drop-dead pretty things and talked about God-knows-what for hours. Things been happening that yoh'll better not hear. But some sisters in College are really nice people.

Table tennis was the next option when the beauties homed. Damn! I was surprised I still had form. I told you guys I am good with the balls. Ping pong is one 'o 'em. I beat two guys silly and they couldn't game my balls....kept smacking 'em away from the bed....sorrry table...hahaaha..We have this other ball on tables guys!.....I was sweatin profusely and decided to quits.

I really gotta shut up here. For those of you would be so dumb to read this shit....tsk...bea with me.....This is the much that happens to a Playa in less than 24hours. Plus for the last time....I ani't that kind of playa...I play different balls

201004 Diary

Wednesday was very much indeed a great day. It all started out as 'just' another day but things took shape pretty early enough.

My first class was cancelled but I used the free time wisely by keeping 'crush' company. Furthermore, my letter came in. Damn! I have been expecting this stuff like for some while now, Thank God it finally docked.

Things went on pretty fine despite the fact that all the classes today were fcuked. Sat back and laughed at another as this pretty thing kept 'yours truly' company.

Went off to KFC to break fast with Mohamad and Erum ( i just happened to fast today). Moe and Naddoy joined us afterwards. Had pretty swell time and kept people staring at our direction- We niggas are used to causing scenes....tsk.....

Thatzit! The remaining part of the day and part of next was spent watching Tv and getting online. Naddoy and Moe sent me back by 'bout 3am and I hit me bed again.......

...and there was evening and there was morning,....another DAY!

A Sweet Ass Story

Usually, I don't post other people's copyrighted stuff here but I thought this write-up is worth the gigs
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• Payday

It was another Payday and I was tired of Mr. Goodbar. I saw Miss Hershey standing behind the Powerhouse on the corner of Clark and Fifth Avenue when I whipped out my Whopper and whispered, “Hey Sweetheart, how'd you like to Crunch on my big hunk for a Million Dollar Bar?”Well, she immediately went down on my Tootsie Roll, and it was like pure Almond Joy!I couldn't help but grab her delicious Mounds because it was easy to see that this little Twix had the Red Hots. It was all I could do to hold the Snickers and Crackle as my Butterfinger went up her tight little Kit Kat and she started to scream “Oh Henry, Oh Henry!” Soon she was fondling my Peter Pan and ZagNut and I knew it wouldn't be long before I blew my Milk Duds clear to Mars that gave her a taste of the old Milky Way. She asked me if I was into M&M, but I said, “Hey Chicklet, no kinky stuff.” I said, “Look you little Reese's Pieces, don't be a Zero, be a Lifesaver. Why don't you take my Whatchamacallit and slip it up your Bit 'O' Honey?” (What a piece of Juicy Fruit she was, too!) She screamed, “Oh Crackerjack, better than the Three Musketeers!” as I rammed my Ding Dong up her Rocky Road and into her Peanut Butter Cup. Well, I was giving it to her Good 'N' Plenty, when all the sudden... my Starburst!Yeah, as luck would have it, she started to grow Chunky and complained of a Wrigley in her stomach. Sure enough, nine months later, out popped? Baby Ruth!

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• Baby, I've Got A Question For You

I know I haven't known you very long and I shouldn't be asking you for this so soon, but I really need it badly. I haven't had it for a while and I can already feel it going in good and hard and coming out nice and soft. If you would do this for me no one would ever know. I am sure you can satisfy my needs and I'd be very grateful if you would. I am very desperate and I need your help. You must think by now that I have a lot of nerve but I can feel my tongue wrapping around it and sucking out all the juices until it's very dry. I am not going to beat around the bush any longer so...
Do you have a piece of gum?

www.jokes.com

Aberrations...

I made mountains out of mole hills and was amazed at how paltry things turned out. Itz taught me not to be presumptous but to handle matters more gracefully than assiduously.

I am trying to get back in phase with life. I had gone out of phase with it. It appears I am not very apt to doing that but, doesn't a journey of a thousand miles thats with a single step? I got home on monday evening a very courageous dude. What brought about the courage is still 'fuzzy' to me.

Somehow, I needed this courage because I was to be faced with situation that would devior it. After sweating to pay-off my bills, my house agent said the contract between him and the owner would expire this month's ending. I am still wondering why the fcuk did he not tell me this before-hand. I am more excited than dissapointed that at last, I have been given the push to leave the goddamn apartment. I was fast getting myself to learn to get used to it. I am now burdened with this rigors of finding a 'nu' place during this exams period....tsk....After making some out-of-the-blues call, I hit me bed.

Yeah, I hit it so hard that I was not up until 'bout 11:41am the following morn. Gat one class today by 2:30 so I took my time to prepare. Mr Fu's Eng. Maths class is one that I always look forward to; It's my best class at the moment and I would be so cross if I missed 10mins of it.

It might sound goofy but forreal, I get so down when I get back my test-scripts and find out that I am short of getting all the answers correctly. Again, I missed out 5 out of 30 fcuken marks to fcuken mistakes. I learnt before-hand about Mr. Fu's strictness so I was careful not to make any silly ones( I am fond of it!). ...Yet, not even going over my answers the third time could stop my eyes from noticing that I left out a 'j' in the course of simplifying a complex number.

The cost of silly mistakes is enormous. I was among the lucky ten that passed the test and might have tied the highest mark in class with some other two fellows but I am far from being excited. Mistakes have cost me lots in life and I've got to deal with it squarely. I'll see you when I am done.

Enjoy!....night!...WHAT!#$%^

I was about outing when I remembered this rather funny-fanny incident.
I am fated to be with this pretty shorty I meet over the weekend at a B-day Party in the escalator alongside other humans and this conversation ensues:

• Ub: Hey!......How are you?
• Shorty: *blurr!*....em....fine.....you?
• Ub: I am great!( I lied!)
• Shorty: How was the night?......did you enjoy it?
• Ub: .......*what!*....errmmm....Yep. You'd betI did!...It was pretty great!
• Shorty: ...I am getting off this floor.
• Ub: Aight. Have fun! Be seeing you around.
• Shorty: You too!

Sounds pretty much likeany normal conversation doesn't it? But,...ermmm I got this scary looks from the other occupants of the escalator. They must have probably wondered...~This player!.....They really must have had a great night!#$%~

She might have had no idea what people thought she meant, but,

Isn't it funny how virgin-innocent conversation sounds kindda "dirty"? Now, I got to explain to this faggards that 'there was no night to enjoy!"

Blessings in disguise

I was really looking forward to Monday, I had this silly study break that seemed to last forever. Deep down inside, I knew I was not really going to enjoy monday as I should. A couple of factors amount to this. Firstly, it's the thought that I might miss some friends who might be starting their holidays consecutively(when did I get fonds of these buds like this!), My friends are on this Fast, so, tsk...everyone very 'blurry' wan. Plus..... there are a couple of burning issues that I am yet to deal with( I choose not to talk it).

I am in this bad mood. I try to hide it but my frame betrays me as it 'just' hangs. WhenI had the news that the merit scholarship I applied for did not come through as expected, I wasn't much worried because I was expecting 'bad' things to happen today.

This are the list of 'bad' things that happened:

• My merit scholarship application wasn't granted. That has more to do with prejudice than silly policies.
• I carelessly missed 4marks out of 15 in my semi-conductor test one( I am so grossed...I shouldhave scored the 15!)
• My international speed-post mail hasn't still arrived after about 11days now.
• I got wind that I might lose a lot of marks in my Electric circuits test as well...plus, The silly class today was so fcuken boring.
• I did not make an earlie move so I couldn't get enough time to help some pretty lass that needed it.

The good thing that happened today, is that I will live to tell my story! This things won't break me, It will MAKE me instead!

When things like this happen, it is just an alerter that goodies are enroute my trail

I long to blog more on a couple of interesting and intellectual stuffz but don't you think I should get-off and cry!

Weekend blues

The humid-hot Saturday afternoon pursued me from PJ all the way to Help College, PBD. There was this meet for 'etudient les' Internationale. It was a great way to escape the bore of a rather unfriendly-warm weekend. Somehow, I am grateful that I did not miss out on this spectacular event. I got to meet lots of other International students, share thoughts with them, try-on some of their cultural delicacies(...and I think I ate snake!.....*purk*), and just stare at each others costumes with admiration or surprise.

Swerving to the vibes of some African music played by some Kenyans was not only gratifying but great. I learnt some Indonesian Tap-dance as from some Indon beauties ass well. Soon, it's food and food and drinks and everybody's so into it that there wasn't much talk!

The evening must have been ended too fast or we just couldn't have enough of the fun. So, when it was time to sing farewell, guyz deligently garnered contacts from the sisters who were not reluctant to give it away. Some of them even gave-out their cells!....tsk...~Mez gat some calls to make man~

It was rather absurd that after a such swell evening, we came home bored. All our efforts to keep the night alive proved to be futile until we resorted to 'makaning' again, watching some silly TV and crashing.

Slumbering outta bed in a home-boyz crib, a call came in. Itz churching time! I didn't really feel much like it but had not particular reasons not to. Church was great and I had a good time hanging out with friends after service to 'makan'

My study break week is almost over and if you asked 'did you study?' ..I'll probably respond....."study!"Many things happened during this study break and they will linger in my mind for a while. I am glad that it is all over. I can't wait to meet up buddies in school and attend some dumb-arsed lectures. I am grateful that I was able to survive this week. I never thought it'd be such an adventure

..Cost of living

There are many things that we take for granted in life, Living is one of them! Recently, I was opportuned to have the platform to re-consider this things......It really humbled me. The past couple of days has really taught some of life's salient issues and I will ever remember not to forget it.

Have you ever considered the actual cost of living? I mean the priceless cost of living? I have been blessed and I am ever so grateful for this. I try as muchas possible not to take any single day for granted.

We wake up everyday and think we have the right to be alive! In this era of human rights we have really been 'brainwashed' with the idea that we really have to live. Ever thought about the thousands of good people that don't wake up again after a good night's rest? Some of them deserve to live than the rest of us but they are taken-off abruptly. We really can't question this things.

The other kind of humans think they've been through with life try to assist nature in speeding up their 're-incarnation' process( I am not a fan!). They take or try to take their life to be away from itz grip of 'unfairness'. Not a bad option!

These two contrasting set of humans remind me that we are still on planet earth! Some think they should live longer, others think they've had it! Yet, there are this strange set that 'wish' they could survive the next day! Now, these are my uttmost concern. I recently met a man who was really stuggling to live. He told us his wonderful story of how he survived all the ordeal... Even though he's got to make do with crutches for the rest of his sojourn here on earth, I could tell that he's very happy to be alive! He's had 15 surgical operations and counting yet, he still uses cruthces to aid billateral movements. I really feel for these people who have to go through so much yet still have the courage to face another day. The sad part is that, most of this fortunate people rarely have the funds to assist them in living properly!

I ponder over the question how much does it cost to live? 100,000bucks?, 2million bucks? ....some of us that have never been to hospitals in our entire life, except that we were born there should have reasons to be grateful.

This should not make me feel lucky to live perfectly with all the physical endowments, Itz rather making me feel grateful and look forward to living each day as specail as it really is. I really wanted to post much on this but I am feeling lazy now.

I don't think that medics have had up to 10000bucks worth of ma currency in my entire life...now, isn't that worth being grateful?

Gat 'em in control!

Crushed with the thought of tommorrow I kindda get into'moods' so easily nowadays, It's a great time though, to sit-back and reminisce, ponder 'bout the past and hope for a great future. I arrived college with this mood and everything just 'pissed' me off! Trying to get over it, I decided to hang out with a homie. I'll tell you it was very fulfilling. I didn't get to go back until about 12am the following day. We talked, ate, read, watched TV until my eyes slowly gave-up on me.

Friday's always been a day to look-forward to....not! My fridays are always unplanned because I always make-room for the inevitable. Lazying on the bed till 'bout 1pm,I decided to make it to the CF(Campus Fellowship) in college. That was the far I controlled my day, the rest were controlled by some other higher being.

We had a not-so-good time in the CF but a great lunch! Sat back to yap with some home girls until Anna-Grace whisked me off to her Niece's B-day. We had to help put-up some pieces 'o paper to 'mess-up' the room. Homies called me up for dinner but I was already at it with 'wiggas'...tsk. Dinner was great! Talked to a few 'wannabees'...tsk, over the dinner and went ahead to celebrate for the shy little girl that won't even blow off her three little candles!

Events took a totally strange shape afterwards and I thank God I was not anywhere else during this time of the day. Yep, I would have probably been in ZOUK shaking-it-out with some nerds. Things happened and things happened and I was prophesied over! NOw, this is not the point! It ain't nu! The point is that I have heard this same words from many Saints over the years but somehow, I shove it off and forget about it in no time. It really hit me! That God would still be thinking great things about me even after all the 'shitz n' stuff' that I have done was crippling. I told you the previously about the 'bad' stuffz I did.....I always do bad things. So you could imagine my "fizzyness" when I am reminded by God that he loves me dearly and is making me into a great 'warrior' cum successful leader, I am appalled! I tried to hold back the tears.

Yeah! I stop it there for now....so, I slept a happy man on Friday. That SOMEONE loves me and is taking absolute control o'er ma future even when I appear to be careless with it, is breath-taking. Won't you be happy?

I sinned.....

I just realised that I couldn't survive 24hrs alone! I tried everything I could but I saw them coming out futile. Did all the bad things today....puffed, jacked....ate almost a carton of cookies but still the dayz still far from being over.

I don't do 'smokes' but I had 'puffs' today...Listen, this is a function of boredom aight! Somebodyz gotta catch me before I 'catch' someone!

This is gotta stop! Iam outta here...claded maself in materials and dashed out before the rain could bother to stop me.

Letz see how we are going to end this...pray I don't have my way.I crave to do real bad things today.

I don't even know why the hell Iam posting this shit...I want to sin...I feel damnation on my heels......dear lord, the only thing I am prayin'... is that ma feet don't fail me now...

Utipe nkpo!

I haven't posted in a while because things that happened weren't worthy of post by my own standards but 'said to blog shit and stuff so I ma fill-yoh'll in with this. Mez been down for a while but sumthing 'pectacular occured yesterday!

Breezed into college for this 5pm class. Tried to put ma back into it seeing I was almost being left out. It went on drizzly until I was 'bout homing. Home boy told me to hold back....sumthingz in the offing. Gat nathing to do back so early I held-back. Warmed up my chords with a couple of kpods about shit and headed online afterwards. Did shit online until 'twas time to quits....next destination is Clemente's. Letz see what this homie got to show!

Whoa!..itz a bag of groceries and some dolls..goddammit!....I was enthralled.....lost for words..how would nigga know that Iam down to the cents? and would need this things very goodly!..Miracles! That wasn't it!...we headed to this 'mamak' shop and 'makaned'.

Craig loitered around and we talked 'bout 'puccez' into the wee hours of the morning. headed to Clementz....saw some movies( not blues I swear) and strolled back early.

Models....!

Another day has come and gone. I came into college to study and go online after sensing that my eyes had enough sleep for the dawn. I did the latter but not the former. As much as I did not want to see any friends today, I did! So I ended up hangin around them than study.

Yeah, Kid bruhz sent the mail I had been long expecting. At last..I can heave a sigh or great relief.....perhaps, not yet....My thing should come in any time from now.

College was kindda empty except for the fact that this sales was going on! Of late, a couple of activities has been goin on in college....making it happen every other week. This week, there was a grocery shop( championing the cause of the Orang Asli's) and some Boutique. You better come to school with you bank cards or credit cards.....looks like we're gonna have to do some shopping here.

Oh how time flies! KDU never stops happening...Itz always good to hang out here and watch...yea...feed my eyez the much it wants. A girl stole the show today. She was gorgeously adorned like "Barbie"! you should should see the thrill in the eyes of studs around....wondering what she had under the minuscle piece of cloth around her desire...supposedly called skirt! goddamnit! I could see the silhouette of the her 'defence' prop-up the minute some breeze did the magic as she struted by.....plus I felt for her jaws...doesn't she get tired of chewing? Sorry gals! I just found a perfect piece of 'model' to jot about today......

She was orgainising this model-wannabe thingy and you could imagine the smiles on me's face as I watched this group of humans try to strut like "Beyonce's". That was by the way...but yeah It occupied my otherwise boring evening. Me-thinks some of the models better pay homage to the gym firstly, some flesh has gotta go off man! Whatz this "baggus" sluts doing modelling! I swear if they had any of the labels I was using, I'd swoop immediately!...no hard feelings gurls!

Whatz a model? Someone that we'd all like to take-after isn't it? For whatever reason, eat what they eat and fcuk what they fcuk! Letz not abuse this word- models. Think guys before sending out "Madels!"

Come think of it! We walk to and fro, up and down, across and around the cafeteria for at least four times in a day, five days in a week and the list goes. Of a sudden, we feel shy about walking across when people are supposedly watching...tsk....People always watch! Perhaps the attention seems more when you are aware that 'all eyez are on you' but isn't that what happens all the time?

Janis said itz a different senario having to walk across during a modelling rehearsal thingy...GOSH! She almost tripped! You know I used to think Jan was a brave girl...NOT! What ever causes this sudden change in emotional build-up I am trying to figure out too! Bust this, You sing always in front of your friends but when they appear to be more attentive, we freak out!

I love to do this guys, but it appears I have to rehearse for this model thingy...c'mmon!....walk this way,.............................,like that!

am so Buff....

I might just have to say it here hoping the fellas would feel this and quit interogating me 'bout my rigidular amoebic statue.

I was born into this going family and thangs went on merrilly until later in life. I had to face the fact that, to be someone in life, I gotta be hardworking. I am glad that it did not take me so long to realise this because this has been a life-line that has kept me going even in this blooms day!

Did I say I was born in the projects? Yeah My Father is a hardworking man whose hardwork has paid-off and has enabled him to take care of his rather large family( Me biological and foster siblings). In my part of the world, you have to take care of your extended family too in need be. It is considered honourable if you did!

So being brought up by a stern and loving Dad, I had no option but to be good, hardworking and enterprising. Every holiday saw me working in one of Daddy's wholesale and retail outlets; I had to move heavy stuffs, account for multiple-hundreds bucks worth of goods, manage staff and stuff. Dad really exposed my young brain to a lot of big stuffz. This really helped in shaping me.

So, itz a function of HARDWORK! yeah! my 'Buffness'. I used to move lots of heavy stuffs around that mum feared I would have Spinal cord problems. I proved her wrong by doing 'push-ups' ev'ry morning. I faithfully did about 20 tough ones every other dawn. It did not dawn on me that I was 'Buff' until recently! So.... I am not that fragile being that was brought up with all the pampers and stuff. I mean I was pampered though. Yet, I was taught to work hard my body adjusted acordingly. I have been through a lot in life, somehow, I wish I was a bit on the fat side but no! my fat burns faster than I can save it, so, ..."let it burn!".

Isn't it strange that the kind of physique that my mum would term to be ill-fed and cranky is what people wish they had here? I am always faced with the question " arhyoh!...where did you get all those goddamn muscles from wan?" I have known better than to argue that I seldom use the gym. If you guys still doubt, go work out for three months and show me how much flesh you've garnered. What muscles? every bodyz got some! how would you carry those heavy bones around if muscles were not there to support 'em?

I shudder to take off my shirt no matter how hot and drenched I may be, cause..if I did, it would trigger off curiosities and unwanted attention. Oftentimes I want to just sit back and take in the admirations...bask inthe glory...you know what am sayin'? Tak! this is not the kind I am needing man! One of ma friends once joked that I might be masturbating too much! justifying the 'extra' muscles. Arhghhh!...perhaps you are true...not! man. I am seriously thinking about taking this gym thing serious. I want to see what I would look like if I were pumping it out faithfully. I had a whole thesis of stuff to talk about on this but it seems they have all evaporated. I'd better do sumthing more 'portant, We'll get back to this.

Events of a wacked week

Itz been a long long week. Having to take part in the just concluded Sports Carnival took a great sap on me. Surfice it to say that I was very dissapointed when I did not get even a single (3 bucks!) medal after 'bout a week's toil. I really had to hook on the power of dissapointment to get going.

Things happened that would have flickered my balance but I held on tight with a zest that defied drop-downs. The finale of the sports thingy left me heaving a great sigh of relief. I could now sleep my eyes out but should I? There are tons of side-kick characters that decided otherwise but I comforted myself with the fact that 'troubles come and troubles go'....'when the goin' gets tough, the tough gets goin'. I ramped on....200mph.

I was out to do 'naythings that would confuse my moods with excitement. After letting my team down during a penalty shoot-out, I really was pissed than thought they were! Siva missed a damned turn and we had to do the 'rounds' for about 13km! Bruhz called and my damned battery went down on him! Gosh! Was today cursed or what? Dropped my kits and next destination was Bintang Walk. Watching 'ninjas' take a walk with thier 'things'. Assumed to have fun while in the real sense I was fumming. ZOUK Kl capped it! I couldn't imagine it that I was swearing to this Techno beats as if I was high on esctacy, and I kept perambulating for hours until the wee hours. I rooved as if I was trying to justify ma 45bucks....god have mercy!

I must have gone-down deep seeing that I did not hear the alarm on my phone go off almost twice! I need to run for my school at 9:30am. Itz 9:00am and I just woke up from bed. Somehow I made it there before the race commenced but didn't still participate. When I homed at 4:0pm without nothing to show except for a nu T-shirt and a bowel full of snacks, I hit ma bed. I was not up until the next morning! I wish the unusual long hours of sleep could erase the memoirs of a wacked-week but it didn't!

The best part was that kid-sister called! dammit! how long has it been?...10months, 14months?.....but I have not heard from this beauty in a pretty long while, we yapped until she was 'bout tears. The rest of the weekend was spent crashing, jacking and dieting. I could think of nothing to do to keep away this boredom! Next week will be worse except sumthing happens. I am having this damned study week!...tsk,...who needs it newayz?

Pray I survive it and I'll see you in a while.

Goose day

Perfect days are had to come by so when they do, I do not forget to remember to thank Jah! I had not so perf. day everything seemed to not go on the way i planned. This reminds of the fact that I may make me plans but God determines my steps... at the end of the day, I saw that there is purpose in everything. A blessing in every dissapointment!

Trying to please friends is not waht I was after today..matter of factly, I didn't really care how they took my actions or my words. I just make sure I am pointing out towards the truth and damn the consequence!

Adviced a couple of friends harshly. Don't know how they gonna take it but whatever...thatz been said and done.I just wasn't feeling me the whole of today. Perhaps that answers why I didn't really place what beloved Mr. Fu was galbing in his Definite Intergral Class. Got to miss my Electric Circuit class for the first time. Obtained permission to play Soccer for my school. My mood went into the game but, thanks gees..We managed to prop-up a draw.

Missed two unknown calls which is most likely to be kid-Bruhz while still at game. So mad, I rushed online but still no mail appears to be coming in from that part of the world. Oh help me GOD!

...But I learnt a very valuable lesson today....."whatever happens, dear Stripers and Playas...may the Lord give you peace".....and I had it! I learnt to feel what it is like to win...NOT!

Dooms day!

Recently, I read in one of the National Dailes about a Belgian woman who lit-up herself because she was denied the right to open a shop by the authorities. I really don't know my stand but the authorities should be smart enough to know that they will have to face the consequences of some of their decisions. Didn't they pay for her recuperation in the Hospital?....'whatz the logic in that?'

A few strange things have happened that I have lost my capacity for wonderment! Grand fathers screwing grand children, Mothers throwing off kids out of 17th floors, People blowing off themselves alongside others, husbands butchering their one-time sweethearts, nerds assualting a cook for singing, mothers slaying their grand daughter, supposedly driving away evil spirits...and the list continues to infinity.

We're living in a cold-cold world if I may borrow the words of my icon...R. Kelly. Fake people, fake buddies, fake friends. Everything we see is fake in a way. Somebody professes love but is actually faking lust. Somebody is dying of loneliness but is faking Solitude. Your guards are down but you're faking everythings aight....Fake smiles are all over the hood.

I hear these news and I take it like any other story....it doesn't strike a chord no more. I just live with the fact that none of this evils shall come nigh my dwelling....and it doesn't! Girls don't wanna go out no more because the fear they might get 'jacked'....If I were a jacker, I wouldn't jack some of them cause they don't have the endowments..yet they are the ones that worry the most! They live in this absolute fear that walking alone is totally not safe...what a world? haven't we heard of tales where this evil comes right to where they think is safe? We could just live our lives fearlessly...some of these fears birth when we are so enthralled by it.

....to be uncontinued

"Whatz the Logic in that?"

Dawn paving way for the sunlight, I viewed this incidence from the panes of my 6th floor appartment.

This refuse truck was carrying away the already full trunk of refuse. I watched faithfully. I love seeing technology and science being put into play. The truck reverses and 'jacks' the trunk onto the truck and as it drives away I see a piece of tissue paper fly out of the "dreba's" side windscreen.

Apparently, this guy who is supposed to clean up the mess is littering the more! The poor guy zooms off! whoa! what a sight for a good Thursday! I pondered over this issue as I busied my self for college. He is driving off the refuse to god-knows-where, yet he keeps on throwing off some-more! whatz the logic in that? Might be that he wants the refuse to accumulate so he can gather it and drive it off on the next trip.....humans!

This brings me to another story of the Scorpion and the Turtle...hahaha..story time kids! This Scorp needs a ferry to the other side of the shore and solicits the assistance of Mr. Turt; Mr Turt responds, " No way! you are definitely going to end up stinking me and I will drown.

Hahahaha...Scorp laughs....If I stink you, you will drown and so will I......now, "what the logic in that?".

Rest-assured Turt. asks Scorpio to hop-on. Half way through the sail, dear Turt receives this kiss....tsk Scorpio had decided against his promise..while both are drowing Turt with the last breath cries out, "Whatz the logic in your action now?" Scorp replies....there is no Logic in this my good friend....It is just my habit - I STING!

Perhaps people don't just see this 'logics'....itz their habit! We are gonna have to live with that.

I walk pass the streets and see unwanted refuse dumps...sometimes they are quite near to the designated refuse pick-up points but people just enjoy dumping it where they think is best! I observe that Refuse trucks frequent this areas and find Refuse bins empty but the surburbs filled. Now letz not dwell on this. It doesn't make sense does it? Don't tell me that the cost of discarding this refuse is so high that people resort to taking the alternative. I saw a post on somebody's gate saying " please take away".....what was this to take away?......some pieces of unwanted wood.....begging people to take away now huh! It was so useful...keep it!

You will see pieces of half lit cigars flying outta the windows in vehicles even though waste pockets are availble in most of these automobiles. Some people should just remain in 'Kampungs'. Preaching civilisation wouldn't just do!

As it is, you might want to quit asking for Logics in people's wierd actions.....Habits are had to change. Don't you think?

nano...WHAT?

In our high-tech-trans-scientific-plus-psychological environment of today(whatever that means), ever stooped to wonder where we are all heading?

Nanotechnology is having the field now. With the invention of Integrated Circuits nothing should be taken for granted...almost 'anything' can now be done. Thanks to the wiz-kids who spend their valuable time in the laboratory trying to birth-out ways confuse us - wierdos the more.

If you have not heard about the tooth phone, you might be spending too much time in 'tea tarik' joints gulpin down every caffeinated cuppa. Yes, a whole telephone has been miniaturised in a tooth! All you need to do is to visit the dentist - not something we would very much love to do; and have this wonder tooth installed amongst your dentition. When a call comes in, sensors do the magic, you open your mouth and start blabbing. Just remember to cover your mouth so people don't think you 'gila already'.

Where are these guys heading? You wouldn't want this multi-dollar piece of gadget to be stained with chocalate so alternative is that you pluck it off before every meal ain't tit? Too much work!

I am thinking our inventing a nano-human! please wish me luck!

Why the hell am I picking on these 'gurus'? I read up a cartoon in the Malay Mail of 6th October and couldn't help laughing alone in the confines of my small room.

The wife( girl friend, whatever!) comes in and finds dude looking for something in an empty box and says to Crush. "hey! I heard you have invented this nano tech piece of Wonder that is 1000 times smaller than a human strand of hair! and the guy feels good in responding....."yeah!"

The wife not satisfied senses something amiss and asks....whatz the problem now?

"I can't find it!" replies the poor dude.....

Immediately, I remembered a joke about a guy who got the wrong medication because the mother misunderstood his 'big' grammar and got spanked for tricking his Mum.

The young lad swore that he will never again use 'big' words when 'just' small ones would do....How does this two incidences relate? Sorry but you are gonna have to find that out yourself. am Out!

tu es' Miracles'

Whoa!

I was just hoping I lay claims on today's miracle and I did! Some days don't just end normally. Something abnormal happens. Yu better not be too busy to notice.

Wandered off to sri KDU for my soccer match with this feeling of unsatisfaction, there was something amiss and I knew it! I just could hold it.

Game went on fine and tiring... had to support my defence, flank the left wing as well as strike damn! you need to see this guy panting...the funny thing is that the fans are cheering! - tsk...Crazy aight? I really gotta work on endurance...thatz my major set-back now. That notwithstanding, I was able to net one ball! - again...not my BALLs.

Itz half time and we are one goal upfront and Phone rings!....dammit!~ I have been expecting this godamn call for so long. Thank gees it came at last. I couldn't really place whatever Kid-bruhz was saying but me-feels good things are coming me way soon.

I went into the second half with this attitude and supported my team to come out 4goals richer. We won again!... You know, we are having this Arsenal genes - We need to win all our games for the league without concealing any goals...pray we keep our course.

Dr. Krishna has the wheels and destination? KDU college! I need to send this urgent mail to Kiddo and do some other unfinished business. Called up Zah to say 'Bullshit!'- sometimes you makes calls and really don't know why you did!( nah! I just missed my friends)....Holla! I met -up with my very good homie Clemente. This dude really understands the bond of homies..."blood is thicker than cum dun-Son". I really appreciate your budship man. Yeah My friend also used this phrase on me today....I think the reason we live is to affect lives..the minute we done we're home! Don't just get "done" so soon.

I really got lotz of stuffs to write these days but I really can't sit ma fat arse down to caress my lovely keyboard. Pray I get horny soon, then we can go rounds n' rounds .....hahahah. I think about this stuffz when I am offline and DONT write them down..the minute I am online...they escape my cranium into free space.

Don't tell anyone...but I am outta here...if you keep seeing any words on your screen, you are either halucinating or both.........

Help!?$&^*@^

"I will lift up my eyes to the hils, from whence cometh my help? My help cometh from the one who maketh Heaven and Earth. He will not let me slumber nor cause my foot to be moved. He that keepeth me will not slumber. The one that watches over Ub will not Slumber not sleep. The LOrd shall be my keeper and shall guide my going in and coming out this time forth and forever".......Ase

That was the word I had today...one of my favorites scriptures..I just realised that whenever I read this I somehow would be needing this assurance so goodly. Even as I flipped the pages of the HOLY BOOK to find out whatz in store for me today I was reminded of this fact that my 'coming ins' and my going outs' are being remote controlled somewhere. I don't have to be careless owing to this fact rather, I'll be rest assured that whatever bruther is passing thro' a higher being has already analysed the situation and has seen that I can come through it.

Am I sounding anointed?...yeah I have always been......woke up at about 4:00am to 'do my thing' and fix some PCBD problems. Slept off again at about 6:00am and did not wake until about 8.

I hate today. I mean todayz classes..there are this murder fcukers who have todayz classes and of late I have noticed that either they dont really know what thery are doing or the whole class is wise....NOT! In our Electronic Laboratory Practice slot, the 'guyish' Swedish cum London-made-all-knowing-smart-arsed Lecturer almost blinded himself when a 2.2kOhms resistor blew-off and send flames of CO2 into free space. This guyz should conduct this experiments before attempting to show-off!

Again Me-thinks my grades are not 'worthy of the calling'...I got to do something 'bout it real quick....the A's should not delude yours-truly.

Most of my friends, I just found out are either in love or lust...whichever comes in handy and I have seen changes in moods. Some are exhilarated, some are sullen,...the rest just have this confused stare...."mother of lust..tsk..LOVE..help us hookers!"

Listen...I have this match thingy today so I got to be with ma buddies before I hit the field and dislocate somebody's Tibia....

For once, Stand in Love...fall thou NOT!

Calculus....

"When the process does not fit in the product, change the product"......Thatz the quote for today courtesy of dear Mr. Fu....But ma question was how about changing the process?.....'also can'! ....dogggy might do the magic! hahahaha

You might put this phrase to motion using any senarios but the one we are focussing here is not the kindda 'product' and 'process' you folks know about... This is Differential Calculus! He needed to put it in this way for dummies like me to hold grib to whatever he was spitting.

I can't believe that I was looking forward to his class! Iam NOT fond of him aight? Itz just that I learn a lot of stuff after each of his class..he doesn't leave out the salient points. I can't believe that I was so eager to see her that when she appeared, I really did not want to! Hugs and stuff did and 'love' was sent across.

Tuesday is one of those lazy days where I have to lurk in bed till late in the day to have the first class but I was determined to make it early to college today perhaps, I might study! I did not make it there until I made some pancakes and received this quit-notice call from the guy who is technically my landlord. Me-thinks it time to relocate man!

...So I slumbered in the scorching sun to college. Somehow, I so wanted to be in college, the next minute, I so wanted to get outta college..You could never forcast these things. and I needed this mood to make-for Norton and Thevenin's Theorems to slip in my cerebelum....they never did!

Things and things happened and I am sitting here trying to wild-away time. Todayz favor wa that I got fronted and was able to make sum 'o ma serious buds smile...keep on smiling and I'll see you in while...

AIDS day!

Mond-Day! was great! or was it tiring? Therez been tons of activities goin on in college these days that guy is so distracted and unserious with lectures. Today there was this thing on AIDS and I spent most of ma days in the smoking zone watching some fcukers do shit under the blazzing sun! I began wondering....'who needs a tan now?'. It was fun though trying to think that we are having fun when we were in fact being fcuked.

Can you gurgitate this? I have an Electric Circuit test by 2:30pm and I am still in the smoking zone cheering my friends to defeat in this silly futsal thingy.tsk...thank God I did not score hundred in the test! Yeah...I kindda deserved to, but I lost a few marks to distraction and stuff. Then came this point where I felt the Circuits were analysing me 'stead of the other way round..I humbly gave in ma papers.

Next destination was Sri KDU. Rode with Siva to the field for the Match against the Staff...We won with a 4:0 margin yet I did not score any goals! imagine if I did! the staffz would have then had to order 'baskets' ...hahahaha.

Amidst all the fun, I felt I was missing something, someone...no! this does not happen to me but yeah! I realised after she missed called me that I had not seen her for the whole day! When did I start having this kindda 'feelings?' I tried to shove that outta my mind and game..I somehow wish she was there to watch me play with balls. I definitely would have needed some "discouragement!"

....Now the day is over, night is drawing near....and the game had to pause...but we still won!

The off-coming of today was that I was so hungry and tasty that I lost ma last 1bucks to a machine! Why are this vending companies stationing machines that steal? ...and I'll write about that later. I got to see how my guys are doing downstairs. Chaos!

Day out!

This month kindda has me on page. Every single day has it own miracle and favor no matter how small the magnitude..I don't seem to overlook 'em. I'll make efforts to put them in "1's and 0's" so people can see whatz going on in yurs trulyz life.

Started the week towardly. Like usual guy needs to go to church and ask 'Daddy' for blessings and guidance for the week; thank Him for a previous great week...that I did! It was fun all the way....meeting friends and stuff.

The turning point was the brunch I had in 1Utama with ma foster family....yeah to all who did not know..I got this mum who takes care of me pretty well and some beautiful siblings whom people think I am crushing on.

'Where do yu guys want to brunch?' was the question after church...The guys at waffle's house must have prayed hard for customers cause they were definitely gonna have more than 6 guys eating their way to Teoman!

Had problems choosing the menu, mom helped me out and soon I was served with a plate of Italian meatballs( I never knew how good balls tasted) and some shitty things, a plate of grill filled fish and a tangoed mango juice. Gosh! I really had much as I have to finish up my zowey's strawberry waffle.

On the sidelines, there was this Malaysian Idol thingy going on right there! My siblings were too excited to see, live!, the fcukers they've been viewing over electromagnetic waves in some cathode ray tubes.

The real highlight of the whole day was that while we were drowning the off pitches sent into free space by this supposedly known Malaysian 'sweethearts' Mum won a two night, three days trip to a resort in Teoman Islands while paying our bills. Gonna have a nice time huh! remember to take me along mum!

Soon itz homing time and we're all in the van after mum picks up some grocs. Nothing much happened next as I spent ma whole day jacking and napping...I told you I was not up for any mischieve this time..I'll see you soon.

wet - dreams....

The first of October hinted me that this month is gonna be Bomb! I forgot to remember that it was my National Day! Yeah in Jungle that I am from, 1st October, 1960 happens to be the day that the British decided we were smart enough and had to relinguish their rude grip on yours truly's fatherland. We became an Independent Nation!

Perhaps I wouldn't have forgotten it too abruptly if I was patriotic enough....nah.....better things happen and you forget the ones that are better- not! I recently received a phone call from my Embassy here inviting me to join some commerative thingy on the 2nd of Ocotber(wow! thatz today!)...tsk...this people don't know that it costs 28bucks 90sens to go to and fro Ampang park!

Whatever...I am just in a bad shape now and bruhda dontz have 30bucks to waste. Reel out the names.....and I still won't make it there!

I really had favor on the first day....though it was a long one - I had to out by 8:30pagi only to be in at 12:30tengah-malam. Yet, I got blessed. With drowzy eyez I hit bed after shoving my laundry into the machine. I never got it out until morning.....slept ever so soundly and sweetly.

Yeah! I had this dream - the kind you know that is not real and don't want to wake up either because you don't want to wake to realise that. But I tell you it was the sweetest dream I've had in a long time. It was about a girl if you need to know(but it was not wet, I SWEAR!)...permit me to pause at that. Some dreams should just come true. I have not woke up ever so happy as today. I was kindda wondering why and then I remembered the dream very vividly - something that seldom happens.

8:05am...

I took ma laundry outta the machine and put them up to dry properly and headed for College....got to get serious with books baby! Had breakfast on Clemente and saw a glimpse of my very good friend Zahara glowing from a distance(yeah! shez lovely when shez on yellow), Called her up to show some love..shez having this marriage thingy and had to leave in a jiffy. Good I gotta continue work...I meant study. That is all that happened until this minute if yoh'll care to know..I'll be filling you in on events later. For now, I got dates with Mr. Lo and Mr. Roberto.....plus, I ain't gay!

So stay outta harmz way; if you happen to still be in doubt,.......FCUK!

...all is Vanity".

Itz happenned and itz happenned...shitz happenned and itz time to remininisce.....This is the worse part of my life..when I have to sit back and think.... about all the stuff thatz happenned in my fews days of sojourn here. After all the 'funs' and 'bore' whatz next?..ain't all this things futile? I mean you just see that at the end of the day you are deserted....friends home with their loved ones and you feel kinda....so so. I understand why people commit suicide - not that Iam contemplating one.

'Vanity is vanity! all is vanity!' one of ma favorite quotes..but do we have to just sit down and watch the dawn slip into dusk?.... we are fated to do this things that at the end of the day will actually amount to absolute 'nothingness'. We just have to lay the cards right so at the long-run, we can bask in the memoirs 'stead of lurk in regrets.

I am getting serious here and I hate it...Playas sledom get serious......hahah....looks like I am going to be a loner in this game...recently...ma tight buds and homies are hooking up and every bodyz looking in ma direction...."wherez she, Ub?" That might just have to be defined as a rhetorical question because...I got no answer for it baby! - at least not yet.

People see me with lotz of shortyz and are confused as to - whoz happenning? but, you can't just nail me guyz...this humans need some love...and I really got no problems sending it out. On this waves, I am still hoping Ms. Charming struts along soon and sweeps yours-truly off his feet. hope it won't be a bad fall.

An incident occured today.....one of ma feminine friends introduced me to her sister - who just came in from the states for holidays as her boyfriend! WHAT!....hmm....ladies..don't hold this against me. I have lotz of "girl- friends"( not disputing!) but Ub has got no hook yet...don't know what the ladies are waiting for!

Ma Telekom test was not very bad, I am so mad that I might have to miss more than five fcuken marks....dammit!..I really needed a sweeper! So, the test ended ma romance with lecturers today...the rest is...flirting time. People gimme daps and hugs...that must be lust!- pardon- love! Ne'wayz, It good to have good friends around you..I am Leo and one of ma things is that I just can't help missing ma buddies..I love hanging out and talking about shitz and stuffz until either someone gets a sore throat or someone develops itchy ears. I wish we could be together in a place forever!......(wouldn't that be boring?)

Lotz of activities are going on in campus today....wonder what our college is turning to - A shopping mall! This kindda environment is really gonna affect the students performance this shcool year( check out the perf. @ the end of the year). Had lunch and gave love to some homies and soon I am left with a handful of buddies to laught at silly jokes..I shall come-back here...seems like I have written much already....don't want to weary you with shit!...who wants to read shit anywhere?

So Friday part I is over...I gist you on the aftermath pretty soon...pray I don't think up any mischieve this 'weakend', I gotta study for Mr. Lo's Electric Circuits test on Monday....don't wish me Luck!..I don't use it.....and Iam outta here.